Thursday, July 03, 2008

Soul Arpeggiation

I can’t remember the last time I sat down at the piano with my books in front of me and played my little heart out. I’ve dabbled with memorized portions of songs I used to know….but when was the last time I banged out my every emotion on the ivories?

I can’t remember.

I’m not very good on piano….in fact, I don’t even really like reading music…but there is something about the sounds that echo from an old upright that are healing. I was having a conversation with a friend last night about this very thing. I can’t stop thinking about what he said about it all, though. He said that love and ability to create beautiful music is something that is engraved in his innermost being. Its innate. So, if its innate in me….at least the love for it….why haven’t I played?

I love music so much. God speaks to me through songs. I’ve always known that. That is the clearest way I can truly experience God. Maybe that’s why I dance. I have so much in me that wants to come out when I hear something so moving. Its how I worship. But, the same thing happens when I play the piano. Maybe its not the dancing. Maybe “dancing” in itself isn’t how I worship, but experiencing the music is. Hm.

A few weeks ago, I stood in a crowded living room at a house show. I didn’t know most of the music. I’d never heard of half of the bands. In fact, I couldn’t even understand most of the time what they were singing about. That didn’t matter. Something inside of me came alive as I stood next to strangers and tapped my foot to the beautiful acoustics. I didn’t want it to stop. I love it that music does that to me.

So what is it thats stopping me from experiencing that all the time?

I know exactly where my books are. I can’t wait to sit in front of a piano and let my senses celebrate. I can’t wait to fill that void.

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